Tuesday Topic: HOW TO HAVE FUN AT YOUR NEXT IEP

How to Have Fun at Your Next IEP

This blog needs little introduction. I laughed so hard tears were streaming down my face. You DESERVE to read this blog from mostlytruestuff.com, titled “Ways to make your next IEP awesome.” It’s by blogger “Lexi Sweatpants” (yeah, she made that  up) who has a daughter with Down syndrome (and possibly autism) and a son with autism. She also has a wicked sense of humor, honestly earned.

I highly recommend the whole blog, but this excerpt will get you started:

“Even with the best teachers and staff, Individualized Education Plan Meetings are kind of terrible…at it’s best, goal planning is boring. At it’s worst, you’re in for a fight that may or may not eventually require tears, attorneys and mediation…In those meetings, I still can’t escape the thought that there could be a way, or many ways, to make them MUCH more entertaining. So I took this question to my autism-blogger friends. What can we do to make these meetings AWESOME?  Here’s our list:

• Every time someone says “with autism” correct them to “autistic” then do he reverse the next time they say “autistic.”
• Ask them if they’ve heard of the (totally made up name) theory of development and see if they lie.
• When they bring up goals that your child has accomplished, pat yourself on the back and say, “good for me”
• Give yourself affirmations at random times. “I’m good enough. I’m smart enough…”
• Insist on doing “Duck Duck Goose” around the table to decide who has to read their section first. Demand outcomes of the game written into the minutes.
• Bring all of your other kids in. And other people’s kids.
• Hand out your own goals at the beginning of the meeting. “The Speech and Language Pathologist will bark when someone says ‘IEP’ 2 out of 3 times with minimal prompting” Measure goals at the end of the meeting.
• Start every sentence with, “I read on the internet…”
• …or “my psychiatrist says…”
• Insist on Person-first language then don’t use it yourself. At all.
• Come in all decked out in sensory attire : weighted vest, lap pad, chewelry, and fidgets.
• Bring a visual timer
• Ask for the meeting to do be done with a sign language interpreter. When they ask you why, call them a racist.
• Say “listening ears” whenever they’re not listening to what you’re saying.
• Every time someone speaks to you, respond with “Are you talkin’ to me?” With full De Nero accent.
• Insist on keeping the chair next to you empty for your friend, Penelope Paddywack, whom no one else can see.
• Elbow your husband and wink knowingly (but act as if you thought you were being subtle about it and don’t think they’ll notice) at every other, then every third thing someone else says, shifting the pattern every so often, completely randomly. They will go nuts trying to figure out the connection between the statements you’re taking issue with.
• Receive a phone call. Proceed to walk the person on the other line through something important, like landing a plane or an appendectomy.
• Just keep doing this, “So what I’m hearing you say is…..” and say what you want to hear, not at all what they said.”

Just doing copy-paste on this, the laughter tears are pouring down my face. Enjoy!

Cheers,